My family and friends are all safe in Boston. Prayers go out to anyone injured or hurt. It’s crazy I was there just a couple months ago.

Life changes

Last night I had a opening dream. I was still best friends with Jake and we were hanging out like old times. I woke up and was really confused it felt so real. Then I realized it was just a dream. It made me realize how much things have changed since last year. Last year at this time I was searching like crazy trying to find a job. I was best friends with Jake we did everything together. My family was a fucking mess. I was in school. Now it’s the complete opposite. I have a job, I’m actually starting my new job in two weeks and I’m super excited. Jake and I no longer friends. I haven’t talked to him in a couple of months. I have no idea what he is up to. My family isn’t a mess anymore. I’m not in school this year. And I’m in a show. It really is crazy how much things change in just one year. I guess things have changed for the better too. For now I just keep living life and keep going. 

Ugh I need more and new friends. 

Now we just have the memories and thoughts. It’s done. It’s will be over soon. I really don’t understand people and their actions towards others. You’ve hurt me, and lied to me. I’m over you finally and have no feelings towards you. I’m done. We had some good times, but now those are over. Goodbye.

Some people change so fast. It’s really weird. It’s crazy what hanging out with new people will do to a person. I know I’ve changed, but I feel it’s for the better. I’m more happy and don’t have this feeling of loss anymore. I feel great. The people that matter and actually care for you will stay and talk to you, no matter what. The ones that don’t will leave you, but later when it’s too late they will realize they’ve lost something. That something is you. 

My Birthday

It’s been a different Birthday this year. I brought it in at 12am this morning working. I spent a big part of it sleeping… But then I went out to dinner with my two best friends. Ashely bought dinner for me which was great. Both Selena and Ashley made me fantastic cards that I’ll have forever. I ended the night with high belting and laughing. Now it’s off to work 11:00pm to 7:30am. I had a decent Birthday I will say. Thank you all who wished me a Happy Birthday too! You all rock. Thanks! 

My best friend gave me this hemp bracelet. I’ve never taken it off since he put it on me (which was sometime in June). To me it’s a friendship bracelet. He’s been the only true friend I’ve ever had and he means a lot to me. He puts up with all craziness, shit and understands me. I honestly don’t know how he does it, but he does. We fight and we’ve gone through some hard times but I just look at the bracelet and remember he’s a true friend and we’ll always be friends. I guess I’m posting this to say thanks Jake. I don’t tell you that enough. I’m proud to call him my best friend and I’m very fortunate he cares enough to still be friends with me. Thanks Jake. 

People change. That’s one thing I’ve learned over the past couple of months. Sometimes we just need to remember the memories and move on. There are thousands of other people out there we can meet and mend what we’ve lost. 


Has been crazy stressful. 

Crying, fighting, arguing, thinking, sorrys, and problems solved. 

Lets forget about it all and move on. 


That awful time when you can’t sleep because you’re thinking of someone.

It makes 10 times as worse when you haven’t talked to them in over a week and you have no idea what’s going on between the two of you. I should be able to sleep but I can’t stop thinking about what’s going on and what’s going to happen. I just miss him. Did I do something? Are we still the same as we were?

I can’t fucking stop thinking about him. Or what happened?


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